This year for Valentine's Day, we wanted to sit down and talk about love. We've been together for five years so far and think we've learned a thing or two about our relationship. Though we're not perfect, we are still working on our relationship and growing everyday! Here are some of our relationship tips that we've learned and wanted to share:
Nurture Each Other
We have this at the top of the list because we think this one one of the the most important parts of our relationship: nurturing one another. What we mean by this is, if your partner has a goal or objective in life that they want to achieve, support them. Don't put them down for anything. Lift them up and empower them to achieve their goals and more.
Communicate When You're Bothered
This one is easier said than done, but if your partner is doing something that is bother you or disturbing your relationship, speak up and let them know in a healthy manner. We think there is a healthy way to do this and an unhealthy way: this depends on how you communicate with your partner. If your partner is doing something that bothers you, we recommend sitting on it for a little and think about how to bring this problem up with your partner in a healthy and productive way.
Talk About Your Life Vision
Make sure your partner and you have a similar life vision. They don't have to align perfectly but it's always worth talking about. For example, If Mimi wanted to move to Iceland for three years and wanted to focus my energy on my career in the US, that could turn into a problem. Its best to talk about these types of things often as people's goals and life visions evolve over time.
Have Your Own/Separate Lives
It's important at the end of the day to love yourself more than you love your partner. To be able to do things by yourself so you can decompress and be comfortable by yourself.
We think this is the key to a long lasting and romantic relationship. Over time, people can become complacent and comfortable. We've definitely been guilty of this from time to time , but it's important to do little things to keep the romance alive. It doesn’t have to be big, like a random get away trip to Bali, rather something small like a candle at the table when you sit down for dinner. Mimi's love language is a bag of Takis, mine is head scratches. Small but mighty.
Have the Money Talk
Most relationships end because of money, our relationship almost did because of it. We think this one is important to talk about so that your on the same page about finances. This can help avoid an argument. For us, personally I'm working on not stressing about it so I can live a more abundant life and be happy with what we have. Be sure to check out our video on YouTube for more information about this one
Don't Bully One Another, Have Respect
We see a lot in movies and tv shows how toxic people can be towards each other in the middle of a fight or argument. We think, "Damn, are people really like that?" We know it's for drama effect, but also we know that things like that can happen in real life. We're not perfect, in the past we have definitely said some hurtful things in the heat of an argument, but we talk about how we shouldn’t do that, and made it a point that during a fight; avoid mean words at all costs. There are some things that just can't be unsaid.
Know Your Partner's Brain
I have ADD and ADHD, this can sometimes cause issues in our relationship. For example, Mimi might ask me do something a couple of times in a row before I finally hear/understand her. But Mimi, most of the time, remembers this and is able to not get frustrated with my lack of attention. Again, we're not perfect and everyone's brain is different. Make sure you take these variables like these into mind when communicating with your partner
Separate Yourself Before a Fight/Argument
This is one we've only recently started to do, but we think this is a great way to take a break before an disagreement. Mimi and I are very spiritual and like to read out horoscope or chart, this gives us time before we talk to understand how we might be feeling and ultimately helps us calm down and think rationally before addressing an issue.
Trust Your Gut
Listen to what your gut tells you, take a hard long look at yourself in the mirror and listen to what you have to say. It sounds a bit odd, but talk to yourself, your gut knows what it wants and how to handle your relationship. Listen to it.
No relationship is perfect and neither is ours, but we think we've build a strong foundation based on trust and communication. We are still growing, evolving and learning in our relationship. These are just 10 small things we do to help keep our love going strong. We hope that you may have learned a thing or two or maybe even took something away that you could apply to your own relationships. At the end of the day, it's all about growth.
Want to hear us chat about love more? Check out our latest video about these tips and hear them first hand!
Happy Valentine's Day!